bike crash and biker fox

so i went all last semester without ever purchasing a new university parking decal; somehow, i made it all fall without getting ticketed (probably because 40% of the time, i walked to class, and 55% of the time, i skipped). but this semester, during the very first week of class, i got caught twice, and am currently fighting some bullshit charges on the tickets. so, i guess i have to give in, get in line, and go purchase a decal, right?

wrong! enter kelso's bike. i've been riding to and fro campus for the past couple of weeks, and i've got to say that the bicycle is exactly the medium of transportation that i've been looking for--and yes, i have been taking it off sweet jumps. best of all, chicks love bikes!

so about thirty minutes ago, i'm living it up on two wheels, and i'm cruising at an above average pace, just riding down the sidewalk; and (this all happens instantly) i hear a POP! and i look down (for a split second) to see the front brakes falling apart--sounds scary, huh? well don't worry, it wasn't a big deal ... because in the split second that i looked down at the brakes, i ran off the sidewalk going over 20 mph, flew over the handlebars, and completely wiped out in front of oxford's 5:00 traffic. yeah, my face literally broke my fall. thank god i hit grass, because i would've scarred my face for life, effectively ending my moonlighting as a male model.

as it stands now, it might be a black eye, it's too early to tell. one thing is for sure, there is definitely a headache. in the aftermath of the accident, i realized that once again, its time for the biker fox to return to my life. i never once thought i would serioulsy contemplate learning the crash and preventative techniques from de fox, but hey!, "ninety-nine percent of the time" he lands on his feet.

best thing about biker fox: you would think such a thrill-seeking renaissance man like himself wouldn't have time to give back to the community, but you'd be wrong ... oh so wrong. the fox knows how to get serious. take it from him:

"For the most unprecedented motivational speaking presentation including bike tricks and comedy like no other you have ever seen in the United States whom can actually relate to high school and college students, please call me directly at 918-493-1966."

don't believe me? just ask danny-elle who she talked to directly when she called that number at 2:30 in the morning. bikerfox is the real deal people. meanwhile, i'm 0 for 1 on flipping over the handlebars and landing on my feet ... i rather prefer my face to be the first thing to hit the ground. but at least this way, i feel somewhat connected to bikerfox in a way that only two rugged dudes with an appetite for adrenaline can understand. i'll close with some more words from the fox himself, in foxy third person, of course:

"BikerFox wants everyone to know this golden opportunity that you've been given on this Earth only comes around once in a lifetime. There are no second takes, second chances, so please understand this life is about you and the mark that you will make on the rest of the world. Oh and guys, this life is all about the girls so if you are having trouble communicating with these cute little creatures, pick up Dr. Phil's book and do exactly what you are told and everything will be just fine."

sage.