... on the shoulders of giants, my ass

the wheel. agriculture. euclid's elements. michaelangelo's david. newton's principia mathematica. einstein's theory of relativity. all considered to be human thought at its highest quality; all are the purest examples of the essence of man's inherent desire to create, innovate, and revolutionize the world. these historical giants have remained unmatched throughout society ... but there now exists another: i recently unearthed a treasure so truly magnificent that it makes the aforementioned accomplishments seem like fingerpaintings and macaroni pictures composed by bronze medalists in the special olympics.

ladies and gentlemen, behold the truest form of perfection ever acheived by humanity: feast your eyes upon the unadulterated glory that is Oakes Films Limited. watch their latest masterpiece, "A Day in the Life of Scott Davis", step out of the cave, and realize everything you once knew was merely a shadow, for the life-changing revolutionaries at Oakes Films Limited are most assuredly gods among mere mortals.

the critics agree:

"a most accurate portrayal of the quintessential human plight! it's almost unbelievable how accurately existence as we know it was completely exposed! mindblowing!!"
--the new york times

"i laughed, i cried, i loved it. what a journey!"
--me

"... oh my god, oh my god, oh my god ..."
--the proletariat

"i must tip my hat, for i have been bested"
--jesus christ