scott rolen for pope!

first of all, i'm really excited that the catholic church is allowing the cardinals to elect the next pope. this is a very wise move, and i commend the church for such a great pick. it probably would've been safer to go with the world series winners, the boston red sox, but i'm glad that catholics saw through the hype.

now, since the cardinals are being given the sole resposibility of electing the new pope, i am hereby starting a campaign: scott rolen for pope! given his work ethic on the ball field, and his rbi's last season, i think he would make a fine pope.


this guy is so a pope 

lets look at the platform:

1) unfortunately, we just lost the most travelled pope of all time. but scott rolen is used to playing away games for months out of the year, and is no stranger to life and the road

2) the former pope was a strict traditionalist, who vehemently opposed women priests, as well as other liberal movements in the church. scott rolen is also a baseball traditionalist, who sprints to his position every inning exchange.

3) pope john paul II was an international icon. scott rolen has six gold gloves.

there you have it, an air-tight open-and-shut case for the new pope. so, to the people of st. louis, let your ball players know that electing the pope is an important decision, and remember: if god chose the pope, he would pick scott rolen.

rolen for pope! otherwise, you might wind up with this guy.